Don't You Forget About Me: When I'm Fighting Imposter Syndrome
I hope you haven't forgotten that you subscribed to this, but if you did, I'm just happy that I'm finally getting over my fear of sharing this with you.
If you’re reading this, I’d first like to thank you for opening this email. It sincerely warms my heart!
Eight weeks ago, I announced that I was going to launch a newsletter.
Eight weeks later, I'm finally pressing send.
If I'm being honest, the only reason I hadn’t sent it was out of fear.
It felt like each week that I waited to send this newsletter, each week I kept subscribing to more and more brilliant, tender, thought-provoking, *chef's kiss* curated newsletters. The more I kept seeing more folks share their voice, the more I questioned if mine was worth another extra email in someone's inbox.
I let the imposter syndrome get to me, week after week. One week I was too afraid that I wasn't consistent enough to start; another week I was afraid that I wasn't profound enough; the next week I was afraid that I had lost my voice as a writer; the week after, I was afraid to commit to one thing" or "theme" to write about every other week. In the spirit of continued honesty, I still have fears about all of these things. But I think the most important thing one can do when they're afraid, is to do the thing that scares them anyways.
So, this is officially “Don’t You Forget About Me,” a newsletter where I’ll be sharing streams of consciousness semi-frequently in hopes of reconnecting with my voice as a writer, a music lover and a communicator of critical thoughts and fleeting concepts. I will be writing about technology, music, film, ideas, feelings, queerness, Blackness and love.
I originally started this newsletter because I've been spending a lot of time thinking about how social media, as we know it, is dead.
Or, in a state of dying, very rapidly. Every time we open Instagram or Twitter, we’re stepping into a burning house, a sinking ship, a fatal car crash moving in slow motion. The fact of the matter is, these apps that we spend so much of our daily lives on aren’t designed to foster community or bring us together or cultivate deeper, more meaningful relationships. They’re designed to monetize people into products, turn creatives into creators, conflate clout and hype and hashtags with talent, curb research and reading with click bait and tidbits, breathe fire to cancel culture, and further isolate and induce us with anxiety— about ourselves and about each other.
The good news is, although I said social media as we know it is dead, social media itself isn’t dead. It’s simply evolving. Rebirthing. We’re experiencing in real time the ending of one era and the beginning of its successor. Social media that is driven by how communities actually connect with one another and thrive. That empowers the wellness and autonomy of its uses. That prioritizes authenticity and equity.
In actively exploring and contributing to this shift, I've been asking myself: “How do I actually connect with the people I want to feel seen by? Heard by? In a way that feels more like a pouring into, a point of connection, an invitation to something deeper, something more authentic?” And that’s what led me to starting Don't You Forget About Me.
And yes, for anyone wondering, this newsletter is named after the 1985 new wave anthem, “Don’t You (Forget About Me)” by Simple Minds, as famously associated with the 80s cult classic film, The Breakfast Club, and Judd Nelson’s iconic scene in which he pumps his fist in the air, of moment triumph, isolation and hope for the future.
I'm not sure if there will be a method to my madness. Some days I'll ask questions. Some days I'll share opinion. Other days I'll share music. One day I may write this whole newsletter in the form of a script. Another day, the form of a list. Or a poem. What I can guarantee, is that I'll always be honest. And curious. And excited about everything that I share with you.
To start, a few things I'm already excited to share with y'all:
THINGS I LISTENED TO
I've launched a regularly updated Spotify playlist! After realizing I've made 30+ monthly playlists over the past couple of years, I've decided to focus on tending to one playlist and updating it weekly with my favorite track discoveries.
Fiveboi Selects: For Your Ears Only
THINGS I READ (Best read on a late Sunday morning, accompanied by a cup of Sey coffee)
Annika Is Dreaming - For when you want to lay your eyes on some tender thoughts.
"Easy Answers" [Real Life] - For a good spiral on the pitfalls of being able to search for anything.
Man on the Moon III: The Chosen Album Review [Pitchfork] - Because let’s be honest, this album was overwhelmingly underwhelming and unmemorable and someone had to tell the truth.
Fruition Digest - For when you're looking for a super easy, visually compelling digital zine to gush over music and graphic design.
THINGS I BOUGHT
Lapis Lazuli and Rainbow Clear Quartz from Amber The Alchemist
Jazz Is Dead 3: Marcos Valle [Vinyl] from The Mixtape Shop
2021 Calendar from Heavy Trip
Feel free to share this with someone who may be going through imposter syndrome or working through something that scares them this week. Just remember, it's always better to do, even if it's just for you.
Go easy on yourself,
Van
I am really glad you wrote this and appreciate your honesty. :) I am personally exhausted by social media but am looking for connection and collaborations as well. I have experienced a lot of issues like idealization and devaluation online, and I struggle with a sense of imposter syndrome myself because I don't have a "brand" or don't look a certain way. But I'm a very good friend (most of the times) and want to get to know people but I'm quickly realizing that not everyone is looking for what I'm looking for online. And I'm realizing that the qualities that make a good connections don't often lend themselves to being great at social media (if social media then becomes about followers and likeability). I find blogs and newsletters to be more accessible personally because stories feel more accessible that just pictures and highlight reels.
I'm excited to keep tuning in, whatever happens. And now I want to give The Breakfast Club another shot!