Okay so yeah, here we are again.
For those of you who are new, hi, hello! This space honestly feels new to me too, as it’s been over a year since I’ve last written a newsletter.
For those of you who have been subscribed to this… well, hi, hello to you too! I’m sure a lot has happened between now and the last time I appeared in your inbox. So let’s just dive into it like we’re two old friends who haven’t seen each other for years but know how to seamlessly pick up the convo right where it left off.
Do y’all remember when I posted this in a newsletter:
And wrote this in another newsletter:
I've been off social media the past two weeks and it is the best decision I have perhaps ever made. I felt like I kept saying, tweeting, posting about how I wanted to leave social media. And people kept replying and saying how badly they wanted to leave too. And then I had this moment where I was like... wait. No one's holding a gun to our heads. We're not actually being held hostage to these platforms. If I keep talking about being stuck here and wanting to leave... why not just leave? It was at that moment that I realized, Oh. This is addiction. Followed by, Well. Now I have to leave.
Yeah, well looks like that whole addiction part was no joke, because somehow I definitely ended up back on social media, and a year later, here I am again, feeling icked out by the algorithm, consumed with weird imposter syndrome, fearful of irrelevancy and craving sweet, genuine, reciprocal human connection. Time really is a flat circle, history really does repeat itself and so here I find myself, returning to the desire to delete my Instagram.
But this time it’s different! No really!
Mainly, in part because we just launched an app called Somewhere Good! I’ve been working with a team full-time for the past 15 months on building a kinder, more playful, less toxic social media app designed for folks to really connect with each other and themselves over who we fully, really are. No algorithms, followers, or rewards for engagement. Honestly, really does feel more like entering a kickback than a feed. And two weeks into it launching, we already have more than 2,000 beautiful folks on the platform and it’s already making me re-evaluate my relationship with the rest of my social apps.
And as I re-evaluate my relationship with social media, particularly Instagram, it’s feeling like the best, healthiest boundary I can set for myself right now, is deleting it off my phone altogether. I tried just turning off the ability to see likes on everyone’s post, which felt a little less unhealthy, but I still can’t shake that unnerving feeling of being addicted to a feed designed to make me feel shitty and sell me things every time I compulsively check my phone.
See, on Somewhere Good, it’s voice note based. So, folks are actually talking to one another. New, thoughtful prompts (which I write) drop each day, so there’s always something to talk about. And it doesn’t feel like a space I can just mindlessly consume people. There are no profiles or followers, so no one can try to seek clout on the platform or be rewarded for being popular. And, I hate to say it, but in true honesty, for the first time in a long time, I’m getting to know people based off their voices and thoughts and the way they see the world first, before their looks and how they visually curate their presentation to the world like on other social platforms.
It’s really like a breath of fresh air, and now that I know it’s possible to feel like this, maybe this is what I want all my social experiences to feel like?
So I’m putting Instagram back on ice (going to keep Twitter (for now), cause that space is real lowkey for me and makes me laugh, even if Elon Musty is about to buy it) and reviving this newsletter space to more intimately share and connect with folks.
My intention is that it’ll be real chill and formless and more of a collection of music, shared curiosities and questions, rather than prose or long-ass writings (like this one, ha. sometimes long writing maybe!!).
I’ve also started an open community Are.na board to function literally kind of like a bulletin board. Feel free to drop links, music, events going on, merch drops, community asks, thoughts, etc. etc.
In lieu of taking a break from Instagram, I want to see what it can look like to create a more “intentional feed” and have a space where I can still see what people share and what’s on folks minds, what they’re up to, what’s making them laugh, etc. without mindlessly consuming it all through IG stories. So please contribute to the board!!
Additionally re: Are.na, here is a board that made me spiral last night called “The presentation of self in everyday online life”.
Also, if you want to find me on Somewhere Good, you can download the iOS app in the App Store. Currently open to folks in the US only. Code to get in is: homies
And as promised! I’ll always share music. Here is a sexy Donna Summer edit I heard a DJ play at a restaurant while at dinner last week.
Enjoy the grooves!
Lastly— feel free to comment and/or email reply back! Very curious to see how newsletters can feel less like a one-sided good/service that arrives in your inbox and instead, function as a portal to more intimate conversation.
TTYL!!
Van